*

N Dearest Chrissy».
Fase ~..
Corky here, back from Zza Zza’s
just in the nick of time to catch the
November fashion line-up of the EC-
CAD Board of Trustees.

‘Blue and Grey were in abundance
with only two brave fashion iconoclasts
brazen enough not to follow the fashion
lead set by Chairman Shumka. These
two fashion suicides obviously have not
got the latest information on the impor-
tance of fashion conformity in these
changing times. Not wanting to be
catty, but isn’t November just a tad too
late in the season to be wearing a white
blazer. Perhaps, as a little bird told me,
someone just came back from Palm
Springs, for reasons that are beyond
this journalist's sense of propriety and
libel insurance. A nice summery
touch,yes, but not when matched with a
brown striped faux silk blouse ( read
ester, poly ) a dark grey skirt and
lemon custard shoes. The combination
made this fashion writer almost loose ~
that eggplant mausaka | foolishly
ingested in the formerly trendy, but now
just dowdy Cafe Emily.

President Barkley captured the
attention of the entire press corps in
attendance with his timeless and
eloquent Report to the Board. Our
President mixed humour with hard
reality, fact with fiction and his favourite
blue striped shirt with white colour and
a tasty eggplant mausaka spotted raw
silk tie. It’s refreshing to see someone
higher than thee having a similar joie-
de-vivre-s’en-faire-rien attitude when it
comes to eatin’ and drinkin’. The report
to the Board was sparse, yet fulfilling
as President Barkley briefly mentioned
such exciting news as another Design
self study, a library study, a Art History
curriculum study, and to the delight of
the fashionable members of the Board,
the College has hired none other than
Mr Karl Lagerfeld to the tune of
330,000 dollars to choose a new colour
of carpet for soon to be expanded
reception area. A little bird told me,
that not only will KL personally choose

the colour, but another little bird told me
at a recent West Van society tea that
none other than what’s her name, you
know that French actress with the
attitude who represents Chanel, will be
doing the job of laying the rug here at
ECCAD.

President Barkley showed us his
dark side ( and flashed a pair of divine
gold and diamond skull shaped cuff
links )when he suggested that the
Ceramics department should take over
the registration process, because they
had done such an excellent job of
organization of the recent cup sale.
Everyone present took these bon mots
of President Barkley with good humour,
but then a definite chill filled the air
when President Barkley, in a low and
serious tone added these words....” As
long as the students are dipped first “.

| could see the headlines flash by “
Barkley wants us dead “. Can you
imagine the horror, the terror of 732
innocent young adults being drowned in
slip ! The screams! the anguish! the
mess ! A little bird tells me that this is
the similar plan last used by none other
than Pol Pot ! Is this the end of us all !
| pray that President Barkley will come
to his senses and realize that the Pro-
vincial government will only fund FTE’s
to a school with living full time students.
Speaking of which, those crazy and
unfashionable Socreds in Victoria, now
known as the fashion centre of the
South end of Vancouver Island, are
planning to increase FTE ‘s for EC-
CAD. How much, | don’t know, but a
little bird told me that one of the condi-
tions for ECCAD students getting more
moola, will be the elimination of black
from our wardrobes. Will we all be-
come nudists then? An art student
without black is like a Monday without
spinach lasagna in an environmentally
damaging styrofoam container. Not to
worry as the BC Government has tons
of old EXPO uniforms just waiting to
wrap around our young and nubile, and
undernourished bodies. A little bird told
me that each department will receive a
different EXPO colour, with Design
getting special 24 Carat gold lame
jumpsuits with Fuschia blouses and
lemon custard booties. Something tells

) net of bhe arts winter edition

SHT« On

me that someone on the Board of

oOo
Trustees may have had a hand in the y
selection of the new ECCAD uniforms.
| just pray to the Fashion Gods that :
these new uniforms will be ready for a
blessing from Karl darling when he
comes to lay the carpet in reception.
Speaking of reception, the atten-
dance at the Board Meeting was “>
abysmal. 5 or 6 audience members in
various stages of Fashion death. One <4
instructor from Foundation appeared in
a severe and post-Woodstock purtainis-
tic black ensemble with matching hair \)
and humour. He sharply constrasted
with the Eatons Bargain Annex look of
the former President of the Students’
Association. A little bird tells me that
there is a coup in the works in that
closet of an office in the Cafeteria, and | want
don’t mean a fashion coup, though god
knows that the entire executive council
could use a couple of week in Paris and
Milan. Seems that one member of the
council ( | won't stoop so low as to
name names ) wants to see more
control over this here paper. Look out,
we could soon be reading Planet of the
Smarts. Yikes! Chilling. | knew there
was something strange about el
Presidente del Student Association. |
mean, have you ever seen him wear
black ? Think about it.
| do ramble, don't |. | can’t seem to
separate the garbage from the refuse, if
you know what I mean. Well Darling,
here’s a big wet one on the lips for you
fashion zombies on the Planet. Keep
up the good works and | almost forgot,
but I’m sure | heard President Barkley
speak of a 8 % percent increase in
tuition and that’s way more than infla-
tion. Well, until next time, this is
Adrianna Staphochokoloff-Huffington
Smith, but all my friends call me Corky,
and I consider each and everyone of
you my own special friend, no matter
what you’re wearing. Remember, its
not what you wear its not getting towed
that’s most important. Give my love to
Les.

‘ON OOL 109 AND 3HL N3HM QNIONVLSONVHYS

Be)
Dearest Chrissy—-
: —

\s

Corky here, back from Zza Zza’s
just in the nick of time to catch the
November fashion line-up of the EC-
CAD Board of Trustees.

‘Blue and Grey were in abundance
with only two brave fashion iconoclasts
brazen enough not to follow the fashion
lead set by Chairman Shumka. These
two fashion suicides obviously have not
got the latest information on the impor-
tance of fashion conformity in these
changing times. Not wanting to be
catty, but isn't November just a tad too
late in the season to be wearing a white
blazer. Perhaps, as a litle bird told me,
‘someone just came back from Palm
‘Springs, for reasons that are beyond
this journalist's sense of propriety and
libel insurance. A nice summery
touch,yes, but not when matched with a
brown striped faux sik blouse ( read
ester, poly ) a dark grey skirt and
lemon custard shoes. The combination
made this fashion writer almost loose ~
that eggplant mausaka | foolishly
ingested in the formerly trendy, but now
just dowdy Cafe Emily
President Barkley captured the
attention ofthe entire press corps in
attendance with his timeless and
eloquent Report to the Board. Our
President mixed humour with hard
reality, fact with fiction and his favourite
blue striped shit with white colour and
a tasty eggplant mausaka spotted raw
sik tie. It's refreshing to see someone
higher than thee having a similar joie-
de-vivre-s'en-faire-rien attitude when it
comes to eatin’ and drinkin’. The report
tothe Board was sparse, yet fulfiling
as President Barkley briefly mentioned
such exciting news as another Design
self study, a library study, a Art History
curriculum study, and to the delight of
the fashionable members of the Board,
the College has hired none other than
Mr Kar Lagerfeld tothe tune of
330,000 dollars to choose a new colour
of carpet for soon to be expanded
reception area. A lite bird told me,
that not only will KL personally choose

the colour, but another litle bird told me
at a recent West Van sociely tea that
none other than what's her name, you
know that French actress with the
attitude who represents Chanel, will be
doing the job of laying the rug here at
ECCAD.

President Barkley showed us his,
dark side ( and flashed a pair of divine
{gold and diamond skull shaped cuff
links )when he suggested that the
Ceramics department should take over
the registration process, because they
hhad done such an excellent job of
organization of the recent cup sale.
Everyone present took these bon mots
of President Barkley with good humour,
but then a definite chil fled the air
when President Barkley, in a low and
serious tone added these words...." AS
long as the students are dipped first“

| could see the headlines flash by “
Barkley wants us dead *. Can you
imagine the horror, the terror of 732
innocent young adults being drowned in
slip ! The screams! the anguish! the
‘mess ! A litle bird tells me that this is
the similar plan last used by none other
than Pol Pot ! Is this the end of us all !
| pray that President Barkley will come
to his senses and realize that the Pro-
vincial government will only fund FTE's
to a schoo! with living full time students,
‘Speaking of which, those crazy and
unfashionable Socreds in Victoria, now
known as the fashion centre of the
South end of Vancouver Island, are
Planning to increase FTE 's for EC:
CAD. How much, | don't know, but a
little bird told me that one of the condi-
tions for ECCAD students getting more
‘™moola, will be the elimination of black
from our wardrobes. Will we all be-
‘come nudists then? An art student
without black is like a Monday without
spinach lasagna in an environmentally
damaging styrofoam container. Not to
worry as the BC Government has tons
of old EXPO uniforms just waiting to
‘wrap around our young and nubile, and
undernourished bodies. Atte bird told
me that each department wil receive a
different EXPO colour, with Design
getting special 24 Carat gold lame
jumpsuits with Fuschia blouses and
lemon custard booties. Something tells

net of the arts winter edition

‘me that someone on the Board of
Trustees may have had a hand in the
selection of the new ECCAD uniforms.
| just pray to the Fashion Gods that
these new uniforms will be ready for a
blessing from Karl darling when he
‘comes to lay the carpet in reception.

‘Speaking of reception, the atten
dance at the Board Meeting was
abysmal. 5 or 6 audience members in
various stages of Fashion death. One
instructor from Foundation appeared in
a severe and post- Woodstock purtainis:
tic black ensemble with matching hair

‘and humour. He sharply constrasted
with the Eatons Bargain Annex look of
the former President of the Students’
Association. A litle bird tells me that
there is a coup in the works in that
closet of an office in the Cafeteria, and |
don't mean a fashion coup, though god
knows that the entire executive council
could use a couple of week in Paris and
Milan. Seems that one member of the
council ( | won't stoop so low as to
ame names ) wants to see more
control over this here paper. Look out,
We could soon be reading Planet of the
‘Smarts. Yikes! Chilling. | knew there
‘was something strange about e!
Presidente del Student Association. |
mean, have you ever seen him wear
black? Think about it

|1do ramble, don't|. I can't seemto
separate the garbage from the refuse, if
you know what | mean. Well Darling,
here's a big wet one on the lips for you
fashion zombies on the Planet. Keep

Up the good works and | almost forgot,

but I'm sure | heard President Barkley

‘speak of a 8 % percent increase in

tuition and that’s way more than infla-

tion. Well, until next time, this is

Adrianna Staphochokoloft-Hutfington
‘Smith, but all my friends call me Corky,
and I consider each and everyone of
you my own special friend, no matter
what you're wearing. Remember, its

‘not what you wear its not getting towed
that's most important. Give my love to
Les,