SHORT GRATUITOUS REVIEW OF A LONG GRATUITOUS MOVIE . My beloved editor Sarah told me to review Star 80, the mostly factual account of local Dorothy Strat- | ten's life and sudden death as a Playboy bunny--so £ did. Here then is the paraphrased version of the movie. . Hugh Hefners "I like to think of everyone here at Playboy as one big family." Dorothy Stratten: "Gee, Mr. Hefner, you're swell." Hugh Hefner: "Yes, Dot, but remember that even though my only wish is to help you and improve the world, there are pecple out there who might hurt you." Paul Snyder: (breaking down the door to Hefner's office) "I'm so depressed; I love you so Dorothy. (Points a big GUN at Dot's head) BANG! You're dead. (he then proceeds to violate the corpse ) "Oh no, what have I done?" (Points big GUN at his own head) "They'11 remember Paul Snyder. BANG! I'm dead too." Hugh Hefner: (Known to friends and acquaintances as Het: )>."O, “sent t=-8t all so, tragie.s" This movie is shit! Why do so-called artists make this sort of thing? Why does the mindless plebian pay five dollars to see it? Seems to me that all the film-maker and audience were interested in was to roll in the muck of famous deaths, while retain- ing hope for a better Playboy-approved world. This is a gratuitous movie. Don't see it! 4 PHILIP WRIGHT BARRIO CHIC RENOVATE YOUR OLD CLOTHES Do you find yourself wearing scraggy, holed, ill- fitting, ugly colored, out-of-style clothes because you can never afford to replace them? If -so, it's best to do something to them, Of course the simplest things you can do would be to dye them in your favourite colours or alter the fit. Or if they need patching, you might make patches in aesthetic shapes, or even silhouettes of areas, making the garment look new again. If you have a painting project, you might forget canvas and stretchers, and convert an old outfit into a very useful work of art that gives free publicity as well. Or you may ornament a boring garment with curios objects like rubber hippopotamuses, machine volts or drinking straws. If you don't have enough clothes of any awful sort you might get a dreary piece of thrift for 25¢ and go to work on it. It would be fun to change the style of something by changing its porportions, cutting off pockets, buttons, flaps, fringes, etc. and sewing on the equivelent pieces from other outfits. You could even make a "collage" or tapestry garment by cutting up several outfits and sewing, the scraps into a new one. Or you can cut a smal] outfit from the best portion of a larger one. SHORT GRATUITOUS REVIEW OF A LONG GRATUITOUS MOVIE My beloved editor Sarah told me to review Star 80, the mostly factual account of local Dorothy Strat- ten's life and sudden death as a Playboy bunny--so I did. Here then is the paraphrased version of the movie. - Hugh Hefner: "I like to think of everyone here at Playboy aS one big family." Dorothy Stratten: “Gee, Mr. Hefner, you're swell Hugh Hefner: "Yes, Dot, but remember that even though my only wish is to help you and improve the world, there are pecple out there who might hurt you." Paul Snyder: (breaking down the door to Hefner's office ‘m so depressed; I love you so Dorothy. (Points a big GUN at Dot's head) BANG! You're dead. (he then proceeds to violate the corpse) "Oh no, what have I done?" (Points big GUN at his own head) "They'll remember Paul Snyder. BANG! I'm dead too." Hugh Hefners (Known to friends and acquaintances as Heff) “Oh, isn’t it all so tragic.” This movie is shit! Why do so-called artists make this sort of thing? Why does the mindless plebian pay five dollars to see it? Seems to me that all the film-maker and audience were interested in was to roll in the muck of famous deaths, while retain- ing hope for a better Playboy-approved world. This is a gratuitous movie. Don't see it! 14 PHILIP WRIGHT BARRIO CHIC RENOVATE YOUR OLD CLOTHES Do you find yourself wearing scraggy, holed, ill- fitting, ugly colored, out-of-style clothes because you can never afford to replace them? If -so, it's best to do something to them. Of course the simplest things you can do would be to dye them in your favourite colours or alter the fit. Or if they need patching, you might make patches in aesthetic shapes, or even silhouettes of areas, making the garment look new again. If you have a painting project, you might forget canvas and stretchers, and convert an old outfit into a very useful work of art that gives free publicity as well. Or you may ornament a boring garment with curios objects like rubber hippopotamuses, machine volts or drinking straws. If you don't have enough clothes of any awful sort you might get a dreary piece of thrift for 25¢ and go to work on it. It would be fun to change the style of something by changing its porportions, cutting off pockets, buttons, flaps, fringes, etc. and sewing on the equivelent pieces from other outfits. You could even make a "collage" or tapestry garment by cutting up several outfits and sewing, the scraps into a new one. Or you can cut a small outfit from the best portion of a larger one.