cont.’d from previous page

“WHAT THE DEVIL IS THE MATTER AT HAND, FONTY?”
“It’s the catalogue, Sir. There are some problems with the
bastardizations you’ve inserted. The bloody designers are
bloody well mad!” “LL TAME THEIR SHREWS WITH
A FEW THAT I’VE HEARD AT THE SHRINER’S JAM-
BOREE... WHAT’S GREEN AND RED AND TRAVELS AT 200
MILES PER HOUR?” “Oh, that’s too much, Sir! Do
save some for the meet!” The second 5:30 a.m. meeting
began, with jokes, coughing, and other disturbances,
setting the ambiance.

“Mr. President, Sir, that’s the best travelling salesman
joke I have ever heard!” “I agree. That was so funny.
You’re the best!” “So, GENTLEMEN, HAR HAR, SUP-
POSE WE TALK PROSPECTUS FOR A WHILE, IN BE-
TWEEN PARODY.” “Of course, President Lucky, Sir,
you’re the one!” “SO, YOUNG MEN, HAVE YOU
WORKED MY BASTARDIZATIONS OUT, ACCORDING TO
MY SPECIFICATIONS? YOU DO KNOW THAT IT HAS TO BE
AT THE PRINTER’S IN A DAY OR TWO OR SOMETHING
LIKE THAT. WHEN IS IT SUPPOSED TO BE AT THE PRINT-
ER’S ANYWAY, FONTY?” “Tomorrow, Mr. President,
Sir...Oh, by the way, chaps, there’s been an entire format
change, but I’m sure you gents can still make it bloody
well work.”

The big day:

With the paste-up for the entire catalogue completed (and
bastardizations intact), Lucky was coaxed and dragged to
where Thing 1 and Thing 2 had been slaving endlessly for
two months.

“Please look this over very carefully...it is the latest stage
where your can change things. Any alterations after this
will be very expensive.” “HAR HAR, WELL THEN WE
JUST MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO PAY YOU LADS! HAR HAR
HAR!” Lucky coughed and chortled, “LOOKS 0.K.! WELL,
GOTTA GO. YOU KNOW, THE DUTIES OF A PRESIDENT
AND ALL! HAR HAR!” “By the way, Thing 1 and my-
self were wondering if we could sign the book with our col-
laborative name, if it isn’t too much to ask...” “WELL,
GOTTA GO, A PRESIDENT’S WORK IS NEVER DONE! HAR
HAR HAR!”

Finally completed, the catalogue was couriered to the
printer’s where it was awaited with bumbling hands.
Wishing to be less associated with the Luck-tainted piece
of Prospectus, the two Things fought desperately to be
credited in a more anonymous manner. They came up
with a swank little logo that could have been placed quite
inconspicuously on the last page, but Lucky was quick to
veto. After two weeks in the dark for Thing 1 and Thing 2,

10

the printed Prospectus finally arrived, much to their
dismay.

Leaving the school with their tails between their legs,
they observed Lucky sitting smugly in his Presidential
suite, Prospectus in hand, patting himself on the back for
a job well done.

Later:

Having arrived home and enjoyed a fine meal, Lucky
gulped his last drop of hot milk and dashed off to bed. He
tucked himself in and turned off his light. He smiled to
himself. “IT’S BEEN A BEAUTIFUL DAY.”

Amoeba is a collaborative effort between Todd Inouye
and Mike Lee.

e2 dit

are of the belief that
the whole procedure will only result in a nice report which will
result in a committee being formed to study the report and
make recommendations in another report to another commit-
tee and so on ad nauseum.

cont'd from page 6

Summing up the whole situation, as put by one student, “Either
change the course for the people in it or change the people in
the course. Not exactly a philosophical profundity that the
committee debated on for ninety minutes a while back, but at
least it’s straight and to the point. And that’s an exception in
Media nowadays.