INTERMISSION by Simone Orlando When I started ballet classes at age 11 at the Carisbrooke School of dance, I had no expectations that my fairy-tale imaginings of being a ‘ballerina’ would come true. Now at 22, I reflect that the dream has materialized in the sense that I have graced many stages around the world as a professional dancer with the National Ballet of Canada, but the reality of a “Sugar Plum Fairy’s” existence is far from sweet. After a month long audition process in the summer of 1987, I won a spot at the Na- tional Ballet School for my Grade 11 year. When I arrived on the school’s doorstep, situ- ated in the heart of Toronto’s Gay Community, I was just 15, and without any contacts in this unfamiliar, ugly city. One might think that my departure from home was premature, but I was actually a special excep- tion, because in order to be a home grown protégé, 10 is the desired age of entry. I felt this overwhelming pressure to prove my worthiness in this elitist environment, and to make up for lost years. In applying myself so diligently in my academic and ballet stud- ies, I was able to block out my feelings of homesickness. Dur- ing what is fundamentally the socially formative years ina young person’s life, I became fiercely independent and disci- plined. I would regularly witness such glamorous beauties as Karen Kain and Kimberly Glasco dancing with the National Ballet, and the indelible grandeur of these per- formances served to refuel my spirit and allow me to return to the studio with greater ambition. Upon graduation, I was fortunate to be given an apprenticeship with the National Ballet and, ironically, I ended up being the only female from my class to receive a contract. The transition from school to the company was humbling, as junior members are under constant scru- tiny by staff and older dancers. A different level of discipline was required to learn choreography quickly, to develop a sense of spa- tial awareness (staying in forma- tion), and to develop the stamina to rehearse for up to 6 hours a day. At first I would become nervous days before performances, but once on stage the rush of adrenaline, the orchestra, the costumes and light- ing effects, enhanced my abilities and made me feel wonderful. Dancing in George Balanchine’s vibrant ballets like “Symphony in C” or “Serenade,” or Glen Tetley’s physically demanding “Rite of Spring” were particularly memora- ble, as the movement and the music combined perfectly, leaving me elated. Tours with the company have taken me to many distant countries: Ja- pan, Korea, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Israel, Germany, the Netherlands, and California?!? From dancing in the moonlit Roman Amphitheatre of Ceasarea on the shores of the Mediterranean, to the sincerely appreciative yet disciplined full- houses of Tokyo, to the perfume and diamond drenched mezzanine in Costa Mesa - where the real show happens at the intermission when the ‘patrons’ go social climbing, my travels have allowed me to witness and experience an array of worlds and cultures. After a couple of years, training, the performance seasons (lasting 3 to 4 weeks or 24 to 30 shows), and the tours began to wear on me physically and emotionally, as is the case for most dancers. Pro- longed exposure to a mirror that reflects nothing but flaws can be damaging. Chronic tendonitis and muscle tension develops, making physio-, massage therapy, and anti- inflammatory medications a neces- sity, but only momentary allevia- tors of discomfort. The intensity of performing increases when an in- - tion in pushing yourself a little jury*is factored in, as an additional amount of concentration is re- quired to tolerate pain, stay fo- cused, and create that infamous illusion of ease, grace, and control. When psychologically preparing for a performance, hoping for per- fection leads to nothing but an emotional roller-coaster ride, as the’ stage, being a smaller parameter of * life, is an unpredictable environ- ment. It may take days to recover and to rebuild confidence after a disastrous performance, and the exhilaration of a successful show is both seldom and fleeting. The ¥% trick is to maintain consist- ~~" ency and to recognize that difficulty will be encoun- tered in almost every per- formance. But even this concept of professionalism becomes difficult to sustain after repeatedly performing 4 the same ballet, such as 25 # ‘Nutcrackers’, and the body is aching for rest, the mind dreaming of change. Or in the reversed circumstance, where there is an incredible amount of stress associated in facing a performance for which you do not feel pre- pared as a result of lack of rehearsal time. by : Ui So what is the allurement of this predominantly abusive existence where self-worth is measured by one’s aes- thetic proficiency? I sup- pose there is always room for improvement techni- cally and dramatically; there is a sense of satisfac- al harder; there is the desire to bring pleasure to an audience, and the compelling nature of music enve- lopes the heart and invites one to express. With a great trepidation I have taken a year away from the Na- tional Ballet to explore other op- portunities and to determine whether I will continue as a profes- sional dancer, or choose another career path. In early August I left Toronto with all my belongings ina, - U-Haul truck and drove the Trans- Canada back to North Vancouver. I am now passionately studying photography and photojournalism at the Emily Carr institute of Art and Design, teaching creative movement to preschoolers, and considering acting and choreogra- phy for young dancers. Having exited the ethereal world of dance, there is a sweetness in discovering new ways in which I can be crea- tive. I hope to find gratification in prompting myself as an individual | as I gravitate towards the real stage * called life. : INTERMISSION by Simone Orlando When I started ballet classes at age 11 at the Carisbrooke School of dance, I had no expectations that my fairy-tale imaginings of being a ‘ballerina’ would come true. Now Treflect that the dream has materialized in the sense that I have graced many stages around the world as a professional dancer with the National Ballet of Canada, but the reality of a “Sugar Plum Fairy’s” existence is far from sweet. After a month long audition process in the summer of 1987, I won a spot at the Na- tional Ballet School for my Grade 11 yeat. When I arrived on the school’s doorstep, situ- ated in the heart of Toronto's Gay Community, I was just 15, and without any contacts in this unfamiliar, ugly city. One might think that my departure from home was premature, but Twas actually a special excep- tion, because in order to be a home grown protégé, 10 is the desired age of entry. I felt this overwhelming pressure to prove my worthiness in this clitist environment, and to make up for lost years. In applying myself so diligently in my academic and ballet stud- ies, Iwas able to block out my feelings of homesickness. Dur- ing what is fundamentally the socially formative years in a young person’s life, I became fiercely independent and disci plined. I would regularly witness such glamorous beauties as Karen Kain and Kimberly Glasco dancing with the National Ballet, and the indelible grandeur of these per- formances served to refuel my spirit and allow me to return to the studio with greater ambition. Upon graduation, I was fortunate to be given an apprenticeship with the National Ballet and, ironically, I ended up being the only female from my class to receive a contract. The transition from school to the company was humbling, as junior members are under constant scru- tiny by staff and older dancers. A different level of discipline was required to learn choreography quickly, to develop a sense of spa- tial awareness (staying in forma- tion), and to develop the stamina to rehearse for up to 6 hours a day. At first would become nervous days before performances, but once on stage the rush of adrenaline, the orchestra, the costumes and light ing effects, enhanced my abilities and made me feel wonderful. Dancing in George Balanchine's vibrant ballets like “Symphony in C” or “Serenade,” or Glen Tetley’s physically demanding “Rite of Spring” were particularly memora- ble, as the movement and the music combined perfectly, leaving me lated. Tours with the company have taken me to many distant countries: Ja- pan, Korea, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Israel, Germany, the Netherlands, and California?!? From dancing in the moonlit Roman Amphitheatre of Ceasarea on the shores of the Mediterranean, to the sincerely appreciative yet disciplined full- houses of Tokyo, to the perfume and diamond drenched mezzanine in Costa Mesa - where the real show happens at the intermission when the ‘patrons’ go social climbing, my travels have allowed me to witness and experience an array of worlds and cultures. After a couple of years, training, the performance seasons (lasting 3 to 4 weeks or 24 to 30 shows), and the tours began to wear on me physically and emotionally, as is the case for most dancers. Pro- longed exposure to a mirror that reflects nothing but flaws can be damaging. Chronic tendonitis and muscle tension develops, making physio-, massage therapy, and anti- inflammatory medications a neces- sity, but only momentary allevia- tors of discomfort. The intensity of performing increases when an in- jurytis factored in, as an additional amount of concentration is quired to tolerate pain, stay fo- cused, and create that infamous illusion of ease, grace, and control. When psychologically preparing for a performance, hoping for per- fection leads to nothing but an emotional roller-coaster ride, as the stage, being a smaller parameter of life, is an unpredictable environ- ment. It may take days to recover, and to rebuild confidence after a disastrous performance, and the exhilaration of a successful show is both eldom and fleeting. The trick is to maintain consist- ency and to recognize that difficulty will be encoun- tered in almost every per- formance. But even this concept of professionalism becomes difficult to sustain after repeatedly performing the same ballet, such as 25 ‘Nutcrackers’, and the body is aching for rest, the mind dreaming of change. Or in the reversed circumstance, where there is an incredible amount of stress associated in facing a performance for which you do not feel pre- pared as a result of lack of rehearsal time. So what is the allurement of this predominantly abusive existence wher: is measured by one’s aes thetic proficiency? I sup- pose there is always room for improvement techni- cally and dramatically; there is a sense of satisfac- tion in pushing yourself a little harder; there is the desire to bring pleasure to an audience, and the compelling nature of music enve- lopes the heart and invites one to express. a With a great trepidation I have taken a year away from the Na- tional Ballet to explore other op- portunities and to determine whether I will continue as a profes- sional dancer, or choose another career path. In early August I left Toronto with all my belongings in a, U-Haul truck and drove the Trans- Canada back to North Vancouver. 1 am now passionately studying photography and photojournalis at the Emily Carr Institute of Art and Design, teaching creative movement to preschoolers, and considering acting and choreogra- phy for young dancers. Having exited the ethereal world of dance, there is a sweetness in discovering new ways in which I can be crea- tive. hope to find gratification in prompting myself as an individual as I gravitate towards the real stage called life.